Jon Stewart Rips Right-Wingers A New One

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    Right-Wingers Fuel Racism And Paranoia

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

O Noes!

The laughs just keep coming from Thomas Lindaman. Had to throw a couple of digs in there just to prove you're a real conservative, right? Reminds me of that parody sketch where Rush Limbaugh says some ordinary things that could be interpreted as being pro-Bill Clinton, then he would repeatedly turn to the camera and disclaim: "Now don't get me wrong, I still hate homosexuals and black people!"

Some of the other stuff, like "date nights" using Air Force One and midweek cocktail parties, is a little harder to justify under the "Diplomat In Chief" designation.

O Noes! Obama wants cocktail parties? That proves Obama's an elitist! Just like that fancy mustard (that somebody else gave him) proves it! We can't have a president socializing with other politicians with some booze and an acapella group! Politicians are supposed to be separated and seething at one another! We can't have a president acting all classy and shit! They have to clear brush!

Wha? So what if Presidents having weekly cocktail parties was a tradition? Conservatives are AGAINST keeping tradition, right? But seriously, the only reason Bush didn't have cocktail parties was because he was an alcoholic, and wanted to avoid getting drunk and falling on a table. Clinton didn't have them because he was anti-social. But at least he wasn't so devoid of friends that he had to join a club for the socially inept.

But hey, Republicans know how to throw a classy party nowadays!

But what about the Broadway date?

O Noes! Obama went to a Broadway show! He used Air Force One!

What? What do you mean it wasn't the bigass plane that we saw in that Harrison Ford movie? What do you mean they call it Air Force One even if it's one of the small planes? What do you mean conservatives deliberately left that fact out of their little articles? He should've went there in a pickup truck! *Sputter* Well, it doesn't matter! He went on a date to see a Broadway show as he promised his wife, when Presidents are supposed to sit around eating pork and beans. That's what class is all about! Broadway is for faggots anyway! You won't see a Republican president going to a Broadway show!


Ronald Reagan: (postcard) President & Mrs. Reagan greet Ann Miller and Mickey Rooney, stars of the hit Broadway show, "Sugar Babies" backstage following their New York performance. March 13, 1981.

Well, shee-it.